Looking At Gift Horses and Mouthing Off
History abounds with legends confirming the effectiveness of promotion. The Greeks, as a last resort, were able to change behavior of the citizens of Troy through the use of a free gift. So surprised and delighted were the citizens that they let down their defenses and welcomed the gift horse into their midst. You know the rest of the story. It was an early and defining example of buyer’s remorse.
Two millennia later, clever companies include the notion of “surprising and delighting our customers” in their mission statements. But few manage to deliver against that mission. Those that do often turn to promotion, the resource of last resort for marketers unsure of where to turn.
Thus, there is a resurgence in the bestowing of gifts for no apparent reason other than, “We value your patronage. Enclosed is a token of our appreciation.” Consumers’ understandable reaction to this largesse is a defensive one, having been taught for centuries the immortal admonition of Virgil’s Laocoon: “Trust not the horse, O Trojans…I fear the Grecians even when they offer gifts.”
Yet more and more these gifts come with no strings, no hidden agenda, and certainly no threat of bodily harm.
Amazon.com surprised and delighted customers recently with a post-holiday package featuring a note from the president and a token of his appreciation in the form of a travel coffee cup. No hidden agenda. Just thanks and “looking forward to a continued relationship.”
Southern New England Telephone followed suit with its second-annual Summer Savings book, sent unexpectedly “just for valued all-distance customers.” It contains dozens of real discounts, typically geared around getting a free entree when you buy one at quality local restaurants. No strings.
In a different vein, but equally surprising, is the Garcia y Vega Free Movie Ticket offering, stickered on two packs of Garcia y Vega Miniatures, about a $4 purchase. That’s sure to raise consumer defenses – what’s the catch? After all, movie tickets are up to $7.50 these days. Who’s going to give one free with a $4 purchase? Well, prepare to be delighted, as well as mystified, because the offer is real: The certificate actually entitles you to receive a full-price rebate with only your ticket stub as proof, up to $7.50 real money! The only catch is a four-ticket-per-household limit. Message to readers: Run, don’t walk, to your nearest convenience store, spend $16, toss the stogies, and get $30 to treat yourself and three friends to the flicks!
Message to Garcia: Gird yourself for an onslaught of redemption response.
But whoa, dear reader. Before you conclude that marketers finally get it, that there is universal understanding of the value of customer relationships, it is necessary to report the gifting efforts of the masters of hidden agenda, American Express. AmEx regularly barrages its customers with “free” offers attached by strings to its partners’ conversion efforts (switch to MCI, rent a car, et al.), but its most recent effort was a more direct affront: Members were offered their choice of four “thank-you gifts” which, if selected (the fine print points out), would result in $3.95 shipping and handling added to their bill! In the immortal admonition of Daffy Duck: “Deth-picable.”
IN A PICKLE? If you’ve endured a Bloody Truth seminar, you may recall the “Rules of Promotion,” of which No. 10 is: “Be a Picky Partner Picker,” referring to the need to select partners on criteria beyond money, for what they bring to the party in terms of added brand value. It’s possible that, through some typographical error, Chevrolet misinterpreted this rule as “Pick a Pickle Partner,” because that’s what they did. Right there in Entertainment Weekly (and other magazines), the Vlasic stork is depicted within a Chevy Cavalier ad, which runs adjacent to a Hamburger Stackers pickle ad. We’re not sure what the association was meant to accomplish, we can only hope that we’re not responsible.
And that’s the truth.
